Journaling

I like to journal. I am not really a great writer of sorts, but I enjoy doing it. I like to put my thoughts to paper. It holds me accountable to different thoughts, prayers, ideas, goals, etc. that I have set for myself and I like to be able to go back and see how those things have been fulfilled or how I have changed. My journal is a reflection of my heart and sometimes it is easy not know where you are going when you forget where you have been. I wrote this poem in my journal almost 2 years ago exactly. It came at a time when I was realizing what it meant to be fully content in the Lord and in who He is and who we are in Him.

"I have hit the wall that is unforgiving,

It has caused me to quench the joy within.

My life is but a mere vapor,

But nothing compares to knowing you

It is a challenge to live day to day

And selfish thoughts become tiresome

You would think that would make it easy

To let you live my life for me.

I take my life into my own hands

And it doesn't make any sense at all

You promise me more than any man

Yet I am the only one on my mind

There are people starving in Sudan,

Cold people flood the streets in Europe

My prayers could be more effective

But there is no joy to replace the sin.

Forgive my heart, bring back the joy.

Build Character, make much of yourself."

It is interesting to me that these thoughts don't just happen at any one point in your life. Our sin is always sin, and it is always absolutely despised by our God. We always fall short, but we have a Savior. His blood has cleansed us and now, more than ever in my life, I am understanding confession and His forgiveness in a way that causes me to ache for grace! Lord thank you for your unfailing love and for showing me that resting in your grace brings freedom and joy.